Sushi is a type of romantic food
by starlightmoonbeam11
Summary: "you know sushi is a type of romantic food" Gaara said to Hinata, "Really, why" "because it has U and I in it. hidden amongst the rows of bookshelves sasuke face palmed. Gaahina, NaruIno, GaaSasu. Humour fic
1. Sasuke the modern day cupid

Gaara stared fondly at the blue haired beauty, which was sitting on the opposite side of the cafeteria. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her blue hair was like the sea, her eyes were warm, and her voice was so gentle; that whenever he had small encounters with her, that voice of hers always had this calming effect on him. She was his angel, which he would always admire from afar he thought morosely.

"Man that is a fiiiine body"

"Excuse me, Naruto?" Gaara asked, surprised at his friend's disrespectful behavior towards his precious angel.

"Sakura, doesn't she have a killer figure?"

" Non existent butt, and a flat chest to boot, yeah she's killer alright" said Sasuke

" SHUT UP TEME, you just can't see her beauty because you are obviously so, so, ummm NOT INTO PEOPLE IN GENERAL" shouted Naruto

" You mean Asexual?" asked Gaara

" Yeah WHAT HE SAID!" said Naruto with a look of triumph

"Asexual is not defined as having no feelings of attraction towards unappealing people Naruto." said Sasuke looking amused.

"YOU JERK! SAKURA IS ATTRACTIVE AN-"

"That's your opinion" stated Sasuke nonchalantly "and quite frankly it does not matter what you think because she'll never go out you"

"Why you, TEME I'll show you!"

With a look of determination Naruto strode purposely towards the girls table; upon approaching his destination he was met with questioning looks from the girls.

"What do you want Naruto?" Sakura said sighing

"Umm I was wondering if you'd like to join me for ramen after school?"

"Sorry Naruto I'm really busy" said Sakura wearily

"Oh, um alright" Naruto said turning away dejectedly

"Hey Naruto!" called out Ino

" Yes Ino" said Naruto turning around

"How many bowels of Ramen can you eat?"

"Huh?"

"I asked how many bowels of Ramen can you eat, per meal?"

"Uh 15, 27 if I'm really hungry, why?

"Hmm not bad, you do eating contests right?"

"Yeah, bu-"

"Do you like ice cream?"

"Yeah, bu-"

"I challenge you to an ice cream eating contest! This Arvo!"

"What?"

"What's the matter Uzamaki? Afraid of losing to a GIRL!"

"WHAT! LIKE HELL! YOU ARE SO ON YAMANAKA! BRING IT ON!"

"Consider it brought" said Ino smirking

"So crème de la crème?"

"Where else" said Ino sarcastically

"Right, see you then!" said Naruto, running back to his table

Turning to Ino, Sakura asked "What was that all about?"

"What" asked Ino turning back to her garden salad.

"Eating contest?"

"What? I can take it, that's the second good thing about break ups. They give you great preparation for ice cream eating contests" said Ino waving her fork.

"Yes, because there is no greater achievement in life then winning an ice cream eating contest"

"Absolutely" said Ino cheerfully

"What is the first?" asked Hinata curiously

"Hmm"

"About break ups?"

"Oh, break up sleepovers" said Ino grinning

Hinata smiled

"Oh look the triumph from return" said Sasuke looking at Naruto's cheerful face as he approached them.

"She actually said yes?" said Gaara incredulously

"Nah he's probably just helping her carry her books to the car park after school"

"That or he said he'll give her your sweaty gym shirt in exchange for a date" said Gaara amused

Eyes widening Sasuke stormed up to Naruto, grabbed him by the collar and threw him forcefully into his seat

"What did you tell her" said Sasuke through gritted teeth

"Ow hey, what's the deal?" shouted Naruto as he rubbed his backside. Irritated Sasuke grabbed Naruto by the collar "What did you tell her" he said dangerously.

"What the hell is your problem teme!" shouted Naruto pushing Sasuke away.

"I just asked her if she wanted to join me for ramen after school, but she said no"

"Do you like her or something?" asked Naruto questioningly

"Hell no!"

"Then why the hell are you acting like this?"

"He thought you bribed her with his sweaty gym shirt" said Gaara amused

"What! Eww, who the hell would want that!" said Naruto with a look of disgust

"You would not be saying that if you lost yours, only to find a group of girls hugging and smelling it, now would you?" said Sasuke darkly

"Or hearing screams of glee, that they had your DNA and all they needed was a method to use their healthy ovum to create a clone of you" said Gaara with a serious expression

Naruto felt a sudden change in the atmosphere, he felt suffocated under the tense and dark environment. Like the feeling he had when he and Sasuke had accidently kissed in year seven, and he was immediately surrounded by Sasuke's millions of fangirls. Shuddering he tried to "lighten the mood" by adding a casual soooo.

"You think that was funny" said Sasuke with a twitch in his left eye, "it was disturbing!" he said seriously, whilst vehemently pressing his finger on the table.

"Yes I'm sure it was, ANYWAY! Guess what! INO challenged me to an ice cream competition this afternoon!"

Gaara looked surprised

"What! Why would she do that? Her number one enemy is fats" said Sasuke dryly

"Dunno, guess she wanted some _real _competition." Naruto said with a look of upmost importance, Sasuke snorted.

" Maybe she just wants to hang out with you Naruto, You are a great friend" said Gaara amiably.

"Aww Gaara" said Naruto as he rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "But umm I think you maybe be right. Oh, Sasuke are you done with that?" Naruto asked, pointing at Sasuke's spoon.

"Yeah, wh-"

Sasuke stared, perplexed, as Naruto put both his and Sasuke's spoons in his mouth.

"hmm not good enough" said Naruto dissatisfied

"What the he-"

Both Sasuke and Gaara exchanged looks of confusion as Naruto proceeded to make odd movements with his mouths. He stretched his mouth open, and then began to move his lips in opposite directions and odd angles. After several minutes it seemed that Naruto had given up on what he was trying to achieve. With a look of disappointment; it looked as if Naruto was now in the process of pondering incredibly hard.

"That's it" Naruto exclaimed punching the table. "I'll see Gai sensei, he'll definitely have some epic mouth stretching exercises! I so have this competition in the bag! See you guys later" Naruto said cheerfully as he ran out of the cafeteria.

"Right" said Sasuke, "so Hinata" he added casually

"wh, wh, what about her" said Gaara a little too quickly. Smirking, Sasuke said " You like her don't you". Blushing Gaara stuttered, " Th, th that's ridiculous, we hardly know each other"

"Sure you do, maybe you know her a bit more than she knows you, since you stare at her every recess and lunch-"

"I-"

"But you both were members of the short lived English literature appreciation society" Sasuke stated pointedly

"Sasuke, I _do not _stare at Hinata every recess and lunch"

"Denial is the first step to acceptance"

"Sasuke"

"Alright, so if Hinata is not the object of your stares then that leaves the very alluring and charming Suigetsu Hozuki"

"What?" said Gaara bemused.

"It's the only logically explanation" said Sasuke matter-of-factly

"How is _that_ logical?" Gaara asked

" Well, considering that every recess and lunch you sit in the same spot and position yourself in the same angle, the only person besides Hinata within your clear line of vision is Suigestu. Now common sense tells us that it is Hinata, however you say so otherwise. Therefore I_ must _ask, when did you find out?"

" About what?"

" You know"

" No I don't, if I did, would I be asking?" Gaara stated irritated. Sighing, Sasuke asked " Do I really have to say it?"

"What?"

"When did you find out that you were gay?"

Gaara was stunned, "wh, wh what? I am not gay!"

"Well logic would impl—"

"I am not gay Sasuke and you know it." Said Gaara seriously.

"Fine", he sighed "I like Hinata, okay"

"Okay" Sasuke smirked

"You are a dog you know that?" Gaara deadpanned.

"Nah I'm a genius bastard and I know it". Gaara sighed in disbelief.

"But in all seriousness, you should ask her out"

"What, no I can't do that"

"Why not?"

"Err, well, umm I'm not err-" Gaara looked down at the table blushing.

Sasuke chuckled. "Alright I'll help you"

"You will?" Gaara asked surprised

"Yeah, why not, I'll get a kick out of it" Sasuke smirked.

"You really are a ba-"

"Yeah I know" Sasuke said brushing Gaara off.

"Okay, well we have established that you both have a passion for English literature, asides from that, do you know any other genre that she likes, you know, like 'normal'?"

"Oh, uh she likes romance" said Gaara thoughtfully, "romantic comedy"

"Okay, well we can't make you recommend a romantic comedy, that would imply that you're gay, but hey holding nothing against you" said Sasuke holding his hands up. " You were born that way, don't hide yourself in regret, so don't worry"

"I'm not gay Sasuke"

"Okay, okay, but you know denial is-"

"Sasuke" Gaara said firmly

"Why so serious?"

Gaara twitched, Sasuke chuckled "okay so does she like mystery slash romance?"

"I don't know I-"

"Well whatever, alright here is the plan, every Friday Hinata visits the library after school to borrow a novel, other days she studies" he added. Gaara stared at Sasuke with a look of disbelief "and you make me sound like a stalker"

"I know this because I go to the library every day to study." Sasuke said offhandedly "So anyway this is what you do, when she goes to borrow a book, you go to the same aisle she is in and when she reaches to get a book you reach out to get it too and there, instant conversation starter." Said Sasuke proudly

"Alright, you know what, that's actually quite a good plan" Gaara said.

"Of course it is" said Sasuke


	2. The secret weapon and romantic sushi

Heylo People, Thank you so very much for the reviews =D Keep them coming. Just letting you know this story is in three parts. I may add a epilogue if I get requests, so let me know.

For now please enjoy this chapter =D

Chapter 2: The secret weapon and Romantic Sushi

Naruto ran through the corridor heading towards the gym, as he approached the doors he could hear music coming from inside; if he wasn't mistaken he could swear it was the infamous song, I like big butts. Confused, he opened the door slightly and peeked inside; what he saw was most terrifying: Rock lee shaking his spandex covered bottom in a most vigorous manner.

"That's it lee" Gai sensei screamed passionately, "Shake it! And shake it! Shake that youthful butt! You need to loosen those buttock muscles of yours, otherwise they'll cramp whist your performing your dance of love!" Gai sensei added; tears streaming down his face. Rock lee nodded, and with a determined look in face he began shaking his spandex covered bottom with even more enthusiasm. After an additional three minutes of disturbing buttock-shaking Gai sensei stopped the music, of which Naruto was most grateful for.

"Alright lee, now that your muscles are loose lets work on your seduction dance" Gai sensei giggled. Naruto vomited a little in his mouth.

"Okay Gai sensei"; Rock Lee saluted, with a look of fierce determination he waited for the music. Gai pressed the button, and the unmistakable beat of "sexy and I know it" filled the gym. Naruto's jaw dropped and in the process, he lost balance and landed head first onto the floor. Rubbing his face, Naruto got back up and peered through the door, he regretted his actions immediately. Rock lee was sliding hands up his legs in a very exaggerated manner; this combined with green spandex , topped of with a wink and a lip bite gave this "seductive dance" an overall of score of repulsive out of 10. He then slowly brought his two legs together, gave a look one would call "muscle spasms in the mouth and eye areas" and then began to do extreme pelvic thrusts, whilst singing the line " I'm sexy and I know it". Naruto deciding he could not take it anymore, barged into the gym and turned off the music; surprising Lee and Gai.

"Gai sensei" Naruto shouted, "I need you to teach me mouth stretching techniques"

"Oh Naruto, aha you've come to the right sensei" Gai shouted, stretching himself to his full height and flashing a blinding smile.

Okay wait here I'll be back in a moment. Gai said before dashing off, comically to retrieve his err "exercise equipment"

Naruto, turning to lee asked "Soo er lee what erm-" Naruto and lee both jumped at the sounds of crashing, shaking and glass shattering coming from the equipment area. Gai emerged moments later with, a bendable ruler

Naruto raised his eyebrows "a bendable ruler" he said "All that damage you caused, FOR A BENDABLE RULER!"

"Well" Stated Gai, "I had to get it from my secret hiding place" looking at Naruto as if he was an idiot. Naruto just stared at Gai in astonishment.

"Now, all you have to do is place this in your mouth-"

"You're joking"

"Now Naruto, do I look like I'm joking" Gai said with his hands on his hips.

"Never mind" Naruto sighed taking the ruler

"May I ask what you are preparing for?" Gai asked

"An ice cream eating contest" Naruto said whilst trying to figure out how to use the god-forsaken object.

"MY DEAR BOY" Gai exclaimed

"What?" asked Naruto irritated.

"Why didn't you tell me?" asked Gai shocked.

"Well I, um didn't think it was necessary"; Lee looked as if Naruto had slapped him.

"Di, di, didn't think it was necessary!" Gai said dramatically "My Dear boy, it is QUITE NECESSARY INDEED!"

"Come with me" Gai said, dragging Naruto by the arm. "Where are you taking me?" Naruto cried out.

"To my _secret weapon" _Gai whispered " COME LEE!" stated Gai and with a look of purpose Gai with Naruto and lee in tow, left the gym, heading towards the hiding place of _the secret weapon_.

Gaara scanned the library for his blue haired angel, within ten seconds he had spotted her in the fiction section.

"She's in the fiction section" he whispered to Sasuke. Sasuke snickered, Gaara opened his mouth to retort, but Sasuke pushed him towards the fiction section. Sasuke sniggered as he saw Gaara casually stride over only to trip over three times. Upon finally reaching his destination Gaara saw Hinata pause at bookshelf. He quickly walked over, tripping only once and pretended to look for book. After a minute, out of the corner of his eye he saw her reach out for a book, with a reflex reaction so fast that it would impress the Flash, he grabbed the book at the same time.

"Oh Gaara!" Hinata exclaimed in surprise, "I didn't see you" she laughed "oh you wanted to read Fifty shades of grey?" she asked, surprised

Sasuke tried to stifle his laughter as he saw Gaara looking at the title of the book in horror.  
"Oh, n,n,n No, _No_. I um was actually um going to pick up the next book"

Crap Gaara thought, now she thinks I am some perverted sicko who likes bondage and takes pleasure in handcuffing girls to my bed whilst whipping them. Wait, why is _she_ reading that?

"Oh" Hinata tuned back to the bookshelf to look at the book Gaara was referring to "Oh, umm, Fifty methods of French kissing" she said slowly

"What no!, I uh , um, I'm actually looking for a crime fiction novel entitled err Fifty methods of, err murder" .

_Genius Sasuke thought, he went from a crazed, hormonal gay teenage boy to psychotic maniac in a manner of thirty seconds. She must think he's schizophrenic. _

What the hell was I thinking? Gaara thought. Oh, now she thinks I'm perverted sicko who likes bondage and takes pleasure in handcuffing girls to my bed whilst whipping them. Who then murders his victims. He thought miserably.

"Oh you like crime fiction too!" Hinata asked excitedly.

Huh, Hinata likes crime fiction. Gaara thought. She does not think I am deranged perverted physco?

_Sasuke raised his eyebrows in surprise, Hinata likes crime fiction, who would have thought, perhaps not all hope is lost. _

"Oh yeah, yes I do" Gaara said smiling "you do too?"

"mmhmm" Hinata smiled " I especially like the classic Sherlock Holmes crime fiction, I love all of that stuff and the romance is great too"

"I haven't read any of that style of crime fiction; I like what you would call 'modern' like Mcbride. Oh and I like horror too, but umm I'd like to try reading the classic style could you err recommend me one, I'd like to try it." Gaara asked nervously.

_And now it's gone Sasuke thought. What the hell is wrong with you, you don't tell girls who you are trying to woo, that you like horror. Just a few minutes ago; you almost gave her the impression that you were a deranged, psychotic pervert._

"Sure" said Hinata happily "come this way" she lead him to the crime fiction section.

She said yes, she agreed, I cannot believe it, Gaara thought happily.

_Oh god, that woman, Sasuke thought, something is definitely wrong with her, or maybe she's too innocent. If it were me I would stay clear of Gaara, he comes of as a creep…_

"Hmm aha, this one is great" Hinata said handing Gaara the book "it's one of my favorites" She said smiling.

"Thank you" Gaara said smiling, taking the book from her hands.

"Um Gaara" Hinata asked nervously, pink dusting her cheeks,

She looks so cute Gaara thought; wait why is blushing? Is she nervous? I make her nervous?

_She has taking a liking to Gaara? Gaara? Yes something is definitely wrong with her. No one can find a person who stumbles over their words, reads horror and gruesome crime fiction, remotely attractive. Ahhh Sasuke thought, it must be his eyes, those clear, beautiful, deep turquoise eyes, anyone can get memorised in them….girls he added, yes err girls not boys, definitely not boys. What am I thinking, I'm not gay! I am most certainty am not gay! Sure Gaara's funny, and he's great company, and oh he understands me so well, and well I suppose he is attractive with that messy red hair, those turquoise eyes, and that deep voice an- _

Sasuke's eyes widened in horror, what the hell am I thinking, I AM NOT GAY! He shouted in his head, whilst shaking it vigorously. To librarian who was passing by Sasuke looked like he was having a mental breakdown. Concerned she approached him and gently held his shoulder, Sasuke shocked by the sudden human contact, turned around and said darkly "I AM NOT GAY!" However his facial expression immediately changed to embarrassed after he had realised what he had said and whom he said it to. The poor librarian, shocked by his statement told him that she did not in fact, think he was gay, before quickly scurrying back to her desk, where she took copious gulps from her mug containing chamomile tea.

"Umm you mentioned earlier you like horror, well I've been meaning to read one for a while now and well umm it's a bit difficult finding one which is great but not too terrifyingly scary, umm could you recommend one?" Asked Hinata blushing.

She's asking me to recommend a book Gaara thought happily.

"_Huh?" Sasuke looked over at Gaara and Hinata broken from thoughts surrounding his mini sexuality dilemma "she wants to read a horror book?" _

_That, is one very interesting woman, she knows how to the play the game, Sasuke smirked, I like her. _

" Of course, follow me" said Gaara leading her through the maze of bookshelf's.

"Um Hinata"? Gaara asked

"Yes" Hinata answered

"If you like crime fiction and English literature, err why were you picking up Fifty Shades of Grey?"

"Ohhh" Hinata laughed sheepishly "Ino recommend it to me. I heard what it was about and the very idea was disgusting, but she said it's good sometimes to read bestsellers, that are in actuality terrible; just to see what society considers a "great read". That way we are "in the know" and if we ever get into an argument regarding the book, we have solid evidence to support our arguments against the book as opposed to basing them on what we have "heard" about it."

"Hmm that sounds fair"

Hinata giggled "Ino is very passionate when it comes to arguments, she always needs to be "completely prepared" even if it is over something small"

Gaara chuckled, "Alright" he said as he scanned the bookshelf. "Ah this one is great" Gaara said taking a book from the shelf and handing it to Hinata"

"Salems lot" Hinata read "this is by Stephen king, isn't he the king of horror?"

"Yes, he's a great author, but this is brilliant, it gives you a great scare without being too much, it's good I think for new readers" Gaara said enthusiastically

"Alright" Hinata said heartily "I'll take your word for it, hmm you know what, I'll think I'll start it right now" she said smiling

"Really" asked Gaara surprised

"mhmm, I'm going to go to my reading spot, which is in a corner right at the back of the library in between the shelves in the ancient history section, it's hidden and quiet, and there's plenty of light. What about you, when are you planning to read your book? She asked shyly

"Oh erm, well I thought I should start it right now" Gaara said timidly whilst blushing

"Really?" Hinata asked a little surprised, "well then, you're welcome to join me" she added bashfully, turning a healthy shade of red.

Gaara looked surprised " I'd love to" he smiled

"Great follow me" Hinata said cheerfully as she led Gaara to her spot.

Now that, Sasuke thought, is my kind of woman. Sasuke watched as Gaara and Hinata read their books in comfortable silence, both occasionally stealing shy glances of each other. Sasuke smiled a little sadly, they really do make a cute couple. A couple of hours later the silence was broken by a sound emitting from Hinata's stomach. Gaara raised his eyebrows in surprise and turned to look at Hinata who's face had turned crimson red.

Laughing Gaara said "you know I'm quite hungry myself" he then glanced at his watched, shocked by how much time had passed.

"And so we should, we've been reading for three hours, it's six."

"Time flies when your having fun" Hinata said sheepishly.

Gaara smiled "Hinata, it's perfectly okay for your stomach to rumble, if you haven't eaten in what 4 hours, lunch was at 1 right?

"Yes"

"Okay, well umm would you like to umm get Dinner?"

"I'd love to" Hinata answered brightly

Wow Gaara thought, she said she'd _love_ to have dinner with me, she'd _love_ to!

"so what do you feel like eating Hinata"

"hmm, sushi?"

She wants sushi Gaara though, hmm how can I tell her that I like sushi too, but without looking like I'm only agreeing because she said so? Oh aha I'll use those 'smooth lines' Naruto was telling me about..umm lets see…

"Sushi is great!" Gaara stated " You know sushi is a type of romantic food"

Hidden amongst the rows of bookshelves Sasuke face palmed. What the hell Gaara? Sasuke thought.

Hinata looked surprised, giggling she asked "why?"

"Because it has U and I in it" Gaara said smoothly

Hinata laughed, "You know I have never heard that one before"

"That's because I invented it" Gaara stated at little proudly.

Sasuke almost fainted from second hand embarrassment

Hinata looked at Gaara amused "you know what else is a romantic food?" She asked smiling brightly

"What?" Gaara asked curiously

"Chocolate"

"Ahh", stated Gaara "because it has o in it right, just like xoxo" he added knowledgably.

Sasuke had to hold onto the shelf for support, cringing inside.

Hinata giggled, "well actually it is because, it's a sweet and tastes nice, and makes a lot of people happy"

"Ahh I see, because it contains an ingredient, which releases hormones for love and such, right" stated Gaara thoughtfully

"Um well yes," Hinata said slowly, "but I like your explanation better, you know about the o's" Hinata stated beaming

Gaara smiled, rubbing his hand against his neck

"so shall we borrow these books and head off?" Hinata asked smiling

"sure" Gaara said

Sasuke watched as Hinata and Gaara headed towards the counter to borrow their books, 'he is such a dork' Sasuke thought, smiling.

Gaara glanced back as Hinata was borrowing her book, looking for Sasuke; spotting him, he smiled, whispered something to Hinata and walked towards him.

"What's up" asked Sasuke surprised "something wrong?"

"oh no, actually" Gaara said blushing "were going to get some dinner"

"I know, I heard it all" Sasuke smirked

"you did?" Gaara asked, looking surprised

"mhmm, there" Sasuke said pointing to his hiding spot "heard _everything_"

"oh" said said Gaara, "did you here my sushi line, pretty smooth right" he said a little arrogantly

"uh huh, yeah, stay clear of those from now on" Sasuke said seriously, patting Gaara on the back

"Huh" asked suddenly looking worried "why did I creep her out? But she laughed?" Gaara's eyes widened "Oh no! She was laughing at me!" He said looking disheartened

"Hey, hey calm down" Sasuke said heartily "look she did find them funny, surprisingly" he added "But look" he said holding Gaara's shoulders "she likes you for, you" Sasuke smiled.

Gaara looked up at Sasuke, a small smile forming on his face "really?"

"Yes, so no stupid pick up lines-"

"Hey-"

"Gaara" Sasuke said sternly

"Fine" Gaara huffed

"So just be yourself; I've been observing her behavior around you, she laughs, blushes, and she invited you to sit with her. Oh and the look she gave you when you asked her out for dinner was, just," Sasuke sighed, smiling at Gaara "she really likes you, so got out there and make her yours"

"You really are a great friend Sasuke, Thanks," said Gaara smiling

"Yeah, yeah, I know, now go" Sasuke said pushing Gaara.

Gaara walked towards Hinata and they headed towards the exit; just before he closed the library door, he turned and smiled at Sasuke.

Sasuke looked as the happy couple left for their romantic "sushi" dinner. She's a keeper, Sasuke thought, and so is he.


	3. Revelations

Hey Guys, sorry for the late update, I had a case of mind block =( But it's gone now and the final chapter is here! YAY! Thank you for the reviews, do keep them coming =). The final chapter has a lot of crack and therefore a bit of OCCness ;)

That's it for now so, ENJOY =D

* * *

Revelations

Naruto had arrived fifteen minutes early, he did not why, but he was feeling very nervous. It wasn't the competition that made him nervous; Gai's mouth stretching techniques using the bendable ruler were surprisingly very helpful, and the _secret weapon _guaranteed his victory, an epic victory at that. No, it was the prospect of spending an afternoon with Ino, _alone_. Sure it wasn't a date or anything of the sort, but still, Ino was a _girl_, and he was a guy, and they were going to spend the afternoon together, eating ice cream; Naruto felt his stomach being filled with butterflies.

"Hey Naruto!" Ino shouted, breaking him from his thoughts, he turned towards the sound of her voice and saw her walking towards him, grinning.

"Are you ready for a serious butt whooping" Ino stated confidently

"Pssh please Ino you are looking at the KING of RAMEN EATING CONTESTS"

" Ramen, Naruto Ramen! This is ice cream, it's a whole different game" Ino said smirking

" Food is food, and you are going down Yamanaka, prepared to be humiliated!" Said Naruto grinning.

Ino snorted " I'm going to make you wish you never agreed" and with that she stepped confidently into the parlor, surprising Naruto who quickly followed her inside. Once seated, Ino asked "Naruto what's your favorite flavor?"

"Strawberry"

"Right, mines cookies and cream, so here's the rules, we'll both order a large bowel of ice cream, it contains three scoops" She added " and then we'll keep them coming until we can't take another bite okay; oh and the loser pays. " She said grinning devilishly.

"Okay!" Naruto shouted enthusiastically "I hope you brought your credit card Ino" Naruto laughed and Ino smirked.

"Suigetsu! One large strawberry and cookies and cream please, and keep them coming!"

Suigetsu looked over to where Ino was sitting, and raised an eyebrow.

"Ice cream eating contest huh"

"Oh yeah", Ino beamed.

Suigetsu laughed and looked sympathetically towards Naruto; "oh man Naruto, if I were you I would back out now, this woman eats like she has fifty stomach's"

Naruto simply smiled, "I like a challenge" he turned to Ino grinning "Ready?"

"Oh yeah, are you? Ino grinned

"Oh yes, and do you know what Ino, you have no chance of beating me, because-" Naruto paused for dramatic effect "I have a secret weapon, a weapon so great that it will guarantee my success" he smiled in triumph.

Ino raised her eyebrow "oh really, and what is this 'secret weapon?" she asked amused.

Naruto grinned devilishly "well since you're going to lose anyway, I guess I'll show you" he turned around and started fumbling with his clothes. Confused Ino asked "err Naruto what are looking for? You're lucky spoon or something?" Naruto chuckled and whipped around, Ino fell of her seat; for Naruto was wearing a green spandex jumpsuit underneath his clothes.

"Wha, What the hell are you wearing?" she exclaimed, disturbed by the disgusting suit.

"What? It's my secret weapon, Gai sensei told me he never lost a match when he wore this suit".

Ino held her stomach, "Y-You're wearing Gai sensei's suit?"

"Well yeah, it's washed of course"

"You're wearing Gai sensei's suit?" Ino repeated clearly horrified

"Yea-"

"Alright guys here's your orders" Suigetsu said as he placed the bowels in front of them. He looked up and them and was about to wish them all the best when he noticed what Naruto's unbuttoned shirt revealed.

"Dude, what the hell are you wearing?"

"IT's MY WINNING SUIT!"

"Yeah and it's a monstrosity; button you're shirt back up" Suigetsu demanded

"No!"

"You look ridiculous"

Naruto turned to Ino, who nodded in agreement, sighing he buttoned his shirt back up again.

Suigetsu and Ino sighed in relief, "alright you guys ready?" Suigetsu asked

"Yes"

"Bring it"

Suigetsu raised his arm in the air and the brought it down, "Begin".

Naruto glared his bowl, Suigetsu was right, Ino did eat like she had fifty stomachs. He was on his twelfth bowl, she was on her fourteenth; Naruto had had enough, but it looked like Ino was not going stop any time soon. Ino seeing Naruto glare at his bowl chuckled "had enough Naruto?"

"Whaa, HELL NO! THIS IS NOTHING!" he shouted shoving three spoons, each laded with ice cream in his mouth, forcing his brain to swallow the now, god-damned sickenly sweet desert.

Ino smirked "face it Naruto you and you're monstrous outfit can't beat me" she said taking another spoonful.

Naruto stared in amazement, despite himself. 'How is she doing that?' he thought

Ino blushed, 'why is staring at me like that, I'm not a pig' she thought a little angrily.

"You know, it's rude to stare" Ino deadpanned

"Oh sorry" Naruto blushed, "it's just you are quite amazing you know, I've never met a girl who could eat as much as you" he said smiling

"That's rather offensive you know" Ino said a little hurt

"How is that rude? It's healthy to have a good appetite; as opposed to starving yourself, Sakura hardly eats anything. I find that an attractive quality in a girl, having a good appetite" he added smiling.

Ino blushed, "sweet talk, will not get you out of paying the bill" she said grinning

"Yeah I know" Naruto sighed. " I was just being honest"

Ino looked surprised; he was being genuine?

"Are you saying that you admit defeat?"

"Yeah" said Naruto chuckling sheepishly, whilst rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

"I have to hand it to you Ino, I don't think anyone can beat you, not even Choji" Naruto smiled

"Pshh he gave up on the 13th bowl" Ino said waving her hand dismissively.

"But umm thanks, you know about what you said before, you're a great guy, terrible at eating competitions, and you have a poor sense of fashion, she shuddered; but you're real sweetheart" Ino continued. Naruto smiled. "Thanks"

'She is so funny, and really nice, and well she is beautiful, I wonder why I did not notice it be before. I wonder if she would like to hang out with me again'

'He has such a beautiful smile, and the most gorgeous eyes. He is such a sweetie. Sakura has no idea what she gave up'

Ino smiled, "you know what Naruto lets split the bill, fifty fifty"

"Wh what? Naruto faltered "why"

"Meh, on a whim I suppose", Ino shrugged. "Now hurry up and agree before I change my mind"

"Alright, sure" Naruto grinned "thanks"

"Mmm"

Ino and Naruto handed the money over to Suigetsu and headed out of the parlor. Ino turned to Naruto smiling "He-"

"Hey check that out!" Naruto practically shouted in Ino's ear.

"HEY!" Ino shouted angrily as she pushed Naruto. "ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME GO DEAF, BAKA!"

"Hey, hey" , Naruto raised his hands apologetically " I'm sorry okay, but look!" Naruto pointed to the pathway opposite them excitedly. Ino turned to the direction Naruto was pointing to, and her jaw dropped; Gaara and Hinata were walking and chatting animatedly to each other, _and_ they were blushing, _blushing_!

"_Gaara_ and _Hinata_, on a _date_?" Ino stated in disbelief

Naruto chuckled, placing his arms behind his head "looks like he finally plucked up the courage, that sly bastard"

"HE WHAT?"

"What? Gaara has feelings too you know"

"I know, but"

"But what?" Naruto asked irritated "he is a great guy and an awesome friend" he added defensively.

"No, no" Ino waved her hands in front of her face, "no please don't misunderstand, no Gaara is a real sweetie" she smiled, "but err umm, it's just I thought, well erm actually the whole school thought, err-"

"What" Naruto asked impatiently.

"Well, everyone though he and um Sasuke were you know, an 'item'"

"THE HELL!" Naruto eyes widened "H-h-h how could you say that? Gaara and Sasuke are the straightest guys I know! They would nev- eww that's ju-ju just disgusting. Oh GOD, why Ino? Urghhh"

"Well I'm sorry" Ino said with her hands on her hips "but you can't blame us" she said defensively

"BLAME YOU? HOW STUPID CAN YOU GET"

"EXCUSE ME BAKA, HOW DARE YOU CALL ME STUPID, YOU OF ALL PEOPLE!" Ino scoffed

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"

Ino snorted, "you're stupider than I thought"

"Why yo-"

"Ino chan, Naruto kun" Naruto and Ino turned, surprised to see Hinata and Gaara who were looking at them, very confused.

"Naruto why are you and Ino arguing?" Gaara asked

"Pff pfft, we're not _arguing_" Ino slung her arm over Naruto's shoulder grinning broadly. "Right buddy"

"_Yeaah_" Naruto placed his arm around Ino's waist "whatever are you talking about?"

Gaara and Hinata exchanged glances, "well, erm you were shouting at each other" Hinata said gently.

"Anyone would come to the conclusion that you were arguing with each other", Gaara stated definitely.

"_Gaara, buddy_" Naruto said as he punched Gaara on the shoulder gently "I think real question here is, when did you and Hinata start hanging out?" Naruto wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. Gaara blushed, "oh well umm were reading together in the library and then we got hungry so we decided to get dinner"

"I see" Ino said, "the classic trick of the old trade," she said winking at Gaara. Both Gaara and Hinata turned a healthy shade of red. Ino giggled, "you guys are _adorable _together"

"Ino chan!"

"Yeah, I'm so happy for you man" Naruto grinned slinging his arm around a very flustered Gaara.

"Na-Naruto kun" Gaara stuttered.

"I can see it now" Ino said dramatically waving her hands in the air; "the beautiful lace trimmed white dress, the flowers, the veil, the 25 carat ring-"

"THE CAKE" Naruto interjected "ramen flavored of course," he added eyes sparkling

"NA-"

"IN-"

"THE HELL!"

Naruto, Ino and the future couple jumped at what sounded like a very exasperated Uchiha Sasuke.

"Wha-" Naruto started

"Come on" Ino said "it came from around the corner"

The four teenagers ran towards the sound of the exasperated Uchiha. Upon peering around the corner, the four were met with a most disturbing site. Rock Lee, clad in red spandex was winking at Sasuke. Gaara, Ino and Naruto had to hold onto their stomachs, whilst Hinata used all her willpower to prevent herself from fainting.

"Why is everyone wearing those disgusting suits?" Ino exclaimed in irritation.

Gaara looked at Ino questioningly, "everyo-"

"Never mind" Naruto interjected blushing " lets just see what's going on" he said turning his head towards the unfolding scene.

"Lee, wh-"

"Sasuke, y-y-you know who I am!" lee asked surprised, tears of joy streaming down his face.

Sasuke was stunned. 'what the hell is happening?' he thought. "Well yeah, bu-"

"Shush" Lee said dramatically "I have something to tell you". With a look of fiery determination he pressed the play button on the speakers, which was on the path next to him. The infamous beat of sexy and I know it blasted in the street. Lee tapped his feet to the rhythm and then began to shake his red spandex covered bottom to the beat, adding ridiculous body feeling movements, whilst biting his lip and winking 'seductively'. Gaara and Naruto stared in horror, Ino had a mini heart attack and Hinata fainted.

Sasuke fell down in shock. Lee, surprised that Sasuke had fell, ran towards him

"D-DON'T TOUCH ME!" Sasuke shouted hysterically "DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!"

"Bu-but Sasuke" Lee said, clearly hurt

"What the HELL do you think you're doing" Sasuke shouted, getting up, visibly shaken by the horrific act.

"I, well, I umm was seducing you" Lee stated bashfully

Naruto fainted, Gaara was stupefied.

"Wh, wh what?" Sasuke asked calmly

"I said I was trying to seduce you"

Sasuke faltered, "a-and why were you trying to do that?" he asked attempting to keep his face neutral.

"I well, I um, hmm, ah! Perhaps this will explain things better" Lee ran to his speakers.

"Wait, hang-" however Lee had pressed the play button and music filled the street again, this time it was a sweet tune. Ino, Naruto and Hinata slowly woke up.

"Wha, what happened" Naruto asked.

"See for yourself" Gaara stated dryly pointing at the scene, all four teens peeped around the corner, again.

Lee had turned a bright shade of red, and had an expression of uttermost calmness. He opened his mouth and sang:

" I threw a wish in a well

Don't ask me I'll never tell,

I looked to you as it fell

But now you're in my way

I'd trade my soul for wish

All this youthful clothes for a kiss

I wasn't looking for this,

But now you're in my way

You're stare was holdin'

Ripped shirt, skin was showing

Hot sweaty gym smell was blowin'

Were you're think you're going baby?

Hey, you just met me,

And this crazy

But here's my number,

So call me maybe?

It's hard to look right,

At you baby

But I really like you,

So call me maybe,

Hey you just me,

And this is crazy

But I love you,

So kiss me maybe?

All the other girls they,

Try to chase you,

But I love you most,

So marry me maybe?"

Gaara burst into laughter, Naruto stared at Gaara appalled, Hinata and Ino clung onto each other for dear life and Sasuke, Sasuke fainted.

Lee gasped horrified at what had happened to his beloved, doing what any knight in shining armor would do, he ran towards his love, and held him gently in his arms.

"My love, princess wake up" Lee whispered lovingly. Sasuke remained motionless

"Princess, Princess!" Lee shook Sasuke as gently as possible "Beloved, wake up!" Lee stated hysterically, tears pouring out of his cartoon like eyes. "Sasuke?" Lee stared at the male snow white, taking a deep breath; he knew what had to be done. He leaned in, slowly.

"Nooooo!" Lee jumped at the sound and screamed, terrified as Gaara charged towards him, aggressively pushing him away from Sasuke. Gaara then held Sasuke gently and stared at him worriedly, "Sasuke, Sasuke wake up" he said gently.

Ino, Hinata and Naruto exchanged glances; smirking, Ino giving a 'I told you so look' to Naruto approached Gaara, with Hinata and Naruto in tow. 'Uh Gaara-"

"WHAT!" Gaara shouted whipping his head towards her

Ino was stunned, Gaara never got angry, _never_. Only Naruto had seen him angry but that was a long time ago, she remembered Naruto telling them that a scary Gaara is someone you would never want to cross paths with; she could see that now, he was dangerous, but surprisingly sexy. Blushing at the thought, Ino asked "umm could you explain, you know, how you went all NOOOOOOO and well now you're all umm" she added gesturing towards his affectionate hold on the damsel in distress.

"I was just saving him from a near death experience" Gaara stated seriously

Ino raised an eyebrow, "how is kissing lee a near death experience?" she asked laughing

Gaara raised a non-existent eyebrow

"Okay, but still, Gaara you need to calm down"

"I AM CALM! Do you realise who you even asked that question to?" He asked

"Gaara kun" Hinata said gently, squeezing his shoulder and giving him a reassuring smile

Gaara sighed, " I appologise, it's just, I'm very worried" he said as looked at Sasuke, concerned. "We should take him to the hos-"

"Mmmm Gaara?" Sasuke stirred as he blinked his eyes in confusion.

"Sasuke?" Gaara exclaimed, "You're alright" he beamed at Sasuke

"Wh, what happened" Sasuke said sluggishly rubbing his head

"We-well, Lee er"

"LEE!" Sasuke exclaimed angrily "where is that bastard!" Turning his head frantically, he spotted Lee shaking in his repulsive, skin tight red spandex; Sasuke got up and charged towards Lee.

"Sas-Sasuke kun" lee stuttered, legs shaking

"You son of a batch of cookies!" Sasuke bellowed, "You God Da-" Sasuke stumbled and fell backwards, into Gaara's arms.

"Gaara?"

Gaara smiled "just relax for now, you're body and mind are recovering from trauma", looking up, Gaara narrowed his eyes at Lee and said lowly "Get out of here" Lee disappeared within 2 seconds.

Ino looked at Hinata, concerned; Hinata gave her a reassuring smile. She approached the 'item'.

"Gaara kun" Gaara turned to Hinata, giving her a warm smile he asked "Yes Hinata"

"Um, you should take Sasuke kun to the hospital, after what he has been through, he'll need you" Hinata smiled warmly at them.

"N,no I'm fine" Sasuke said getting out of Gaara's warm embrace, embarrassed with the position he was in. "Take Hinata home Gaara" Sasuke ordered

"Ah yes of course, but we'll take you the hospital first, is that alright Hinata?"  
"Oh of course" she smiled at Sasuke "but Gaara I can just walk with Ino chan"

"Yes Gaara" Ino interjected "it's alright, accompany Sasuke, he _needs _you"

"I don't need anyone" Sasuke said angrily "Now Gaara walk Hinata home" he said drawing out each syllable.

"Bu-"

"Walk. Her. Home" Sasuke glared at Gaara

"OKAY!" Naruto shouted "how about I take teme to the hospital, teme don't argue!" he said raising his hand like a teacher would, when silencing a stubborn child. "Gaara you walk Hinata chan home kay, sound good?"

"Okay" Gaara said "but I'll check up on you Sasuke after I drop of Hinata"

"Geez Gaara you don't hav-"

"OH FOR CHRIST SAKE JUST ADMIT THAT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER ALREADY" shouted a very frustrated INO. Everyone turned to her.

"EXCUSE ME?"

"WHAT?"

"YOU IDIOTIC WOMAN!"

"Ino Chan!"

Ino stared at them in a teacher like manner, "everything would be so much better if Gaara and Sasuke admitted their love for each other" she sighed.

"EXCUSE ME?"

"WHAT? WHAT?" "I do not love Gaara, are you seriously that stupid" Sasuke stared incredulously at Ino

"And I do not love Sasuke, he is my friend and I care about him, a lot". Gaara turned and smiled at Sasuke, Sasuke smiled back. "But the person I like, like, I like" Gaara turned to Hinata and blushed "I like you Hinata, a lot" Hinata blinked in surprise, her face slowly colouring.

Naruto smiled "how about you two love birds head off now" he said; gently pushing Hinata and Gaara forward. As they headed off, Naruto, Ino and Sasuke saw Hinata blush as she slipped her hand in Gaara's and give him a quick kiss on the cheek. Gaara's face turned to the colour of his hair. 'Very attractive' Ino noted. 'Kawaii' thought Naruto. 'Cute' Sasuke thought.

"Now mister" Naruto smiled deviously "to the hospital" he said as he striked a superhero pose.

"Yeah, no" Sasuke said walking away

"I'm taking you the hospital teme, even if I have to drag you there" Naruto exclaimed, grabbing Sasuke by the collar then throwing him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Ino laughed.

"Why you dobe" Sasuke thrashed wildly, striking Naruto in the jaw.

"OWWW" Naruto wailed "you BASTARD, that's it, you give me no choice, Sasuke" Naruto paused for dramatic effect. "If you don't go the hospital I'll see to it that in every gym class you wear that hideously un-youthful green jumpsuit"

Sasuke snorted "like you could make that happen"

"I'll have no trouble convincing Gai sensei and - " Naruto smiled deviously "I'm pretty sure Tsunade would be more than happy to see _Uchiha Sasuke_ parade around the gym in a green spandex suit."

Ino snickered "sex-say"

Sasuke paled, "you bastard, you piece of –"

"Yeah, Yeah I know I'm a genius bastard and I know it" Naruto wore a cheshire grin " now where have I heard that one before?"

Sasuke glared, snorting "Genius bastard yet you can't come up with your own titles, I'm walking" Naruto grinned and let Sasuke off his back gently. Shoving Naruto roughly so he fell onto the pavement, Sasuke stormed off towards the hospital. Ino stared at his retreating back and shook her head, helping Naruto up they both ran after Sasuke.

Sasuke glared at the woman who gave him the finger. Che, you're in my way, I'll bulldoze you over, stupid cow, don't you realise that when a man is angry move out of the god damn way. Idiots Sasuke thought, I really wish Gaara were here, he always made everything better, he had this calming aura and this way of talking. Sasuke sighed; the stupid blonde pig was right, he really did need Gaara.

* * *

Sooo, what did you think? Yes I changed the lyrics, not very imaginative am i?

While I was writing this I feel in love with Sasuke and Gaara's relationship, SO, I'm thinking of writing a sequel, where Gaara and Sasuke end up together. I've already got a rough plan, so tell me if you want a Gaasasu ending. If you guys do I'll write one =D

Thanks for the support =D


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